Communication

Communication is like tossing a ball back and forth: energizing and relating
In effective communication energy flows
Need of the other, cooperation
People are different – relationship serves a s a bridge
Agreement does not have to be reached, but connection needs to be established
Lecture, making pronouncements (talking to child) vs interpersonal communication
Communication vs isolation
According to Jung isolation leads to evil, can only be prevented through strong sense of good or relationships to others (emotional isolation
Adequate toss is not too far or not directed on head
“Always” of blame vs speaking about own feelings
People we want to reach have ot be taken into account – importance of listening
Agenda – needs to be worked through, might not entirely because one side is blocking or does not know his  own agenda
Interruption: do not like what we hear or have own agnda vs patience and maturity
Creative listening is aimed at understanding, not lecturing or judging, listening creates readiness in other to listen
Talking responsibly: appropriate time and place
Actions communicating indirectly are mostly destructive
Uncontrolled emotions are like giants, dangerous and destructive and overwhelming
Response in other: rage creates rage, unable to hear
Train the giants to be servants, heroic acts, great achievements in creativity...regulate and control our emotions so they are positive and useful
Suppressing emotions does not work and will silence all emotions
Defuse anger through “I understand” approach

Handling anger, being aware of its presence and working on and with it, expressing it without being consumed by it
Consider who is advising out of what personal situation, writing letter/note

Animus – anima
Masculine tendencies in women – feminine tendencies in men
Animus: blunt, inflexible, judgmental, aggressive
Anima: moody, sulky, peevish, overly sensitive
Keeping anima and animus qualities like these ones within and let not come them between people
Poison and emotionality vs power and criticism
Archetypes a twar
Man or woman barely present, results in crushed egos
Anima/animus in response to hurt, solution: work and acknowledge own feelings and communicate them properly
Proteus: changing shape, changing conversations. Reasons: the subject is painful to them, or they want to say something but not take ownership and responsibility for it
Shifting ground: blame replaced by blame
Bird in the bushes: hidden criticism
You shouldn’t feel like that – dismiss feelings as unimportant, cultural thing. However feelings are facts of relationships
Training the ego to stand outside the situation despite its involvement to detect these strategies

Guilt
Guilt provokes feelings of low self-image
Real guilt vs false guilt
Accusing voice Inner Critic = poses as conscience, puts one down, should/woulds – true Conscience = true nature, God’s voice/guidance
False guilt diminishes our personality, real guilt does not
Neurotic guilt as an ally to avoid facing the fact that our own unhappiness is our problem caused by us and only changeable by us

Indirect communication
Body language
Slip of tongue
The urge to make secrets public
Choosing indirect way to make a statement: apology, love declaration – fear of rejection
Acting out

People are different
Thinking type vs feeling type + sensation vs intuition
Extroversion vs introversion two extremes of a spectrum, people are sprinkeled between these two extremes = psychological orientation on which the other combinations are added
By accepting other peoples’ standpoints we broaden our personality
Letting the other be himself is love